How do I explain my aunt's mental illness to my kids?

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Radical Goats
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How do I explain my aunt's mental illness to my kids?

Post by Radical Goats »

Full disclosure: my husband and I don't have kids yet, but we will within the next couple of years or so, and this has been on my mind a lot.

My maternal aunt suffers from OCD with schizophrenic affect. She doesn't see things or hear voices, but she has paranoid delusions that drive her obsessive behaviors. She has been committed at least once that I know of. For decades she was unmedicated, not doing any therapy or self-care, and financially supported by my grandparents - her relationship with them would have been pretty dysfunctional even without her illness, but that's another story.

A few years ago my mother became my aunt's legal guardian. My aunt now lives in a supervised group home where they have her participate in a lot of social activities (so she doesn't isolate herself like she used to) and make sure she takes her meds. She's much better now than she was and no longer engages in most of her obsessive behaviors. However, she has the maturity level of a 12-year-old and is never going to be able to live independently. Also, while she's charming and good-natured (when medicated), she is still - as my dad puts it - kind of batty.

I live near her and see her fairly often. I am also going to be more involved in her care in the future, especially since I'm going to be her legal guardian if something happens to my mom. When I have kids, she is going to have a lot of contact with them. How will I explain to my kids, in an age-appropriate way, that she is mentally ill and sometimes does/says inappropriate things? I want to be honest with my kids and not avoid talking about the issue. Has anyone else been in a similar situation, and if so, can you offer some advice?
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Fargin
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Re: How do I explain my aunt's mental illness to my kids?

Post by Fargin »

I don't have children, but I had a similar aunt, who I were afraid of and uncomfortable around, because she said and did awkward things. My family was always busy with keeping up appearances, so it was confusing and scary, when someone didn't fit the perfect picture. When I asked, I think I was shamed for even drawing out the obvious, that she was noticeable different and therefor a little scary.

I would have liked a little more openness and acceptance, but that was a general problem in the family, not only with my aunt.

I'd say, be open when your kids ask these innocent questions they ask, don't shame them for these questions, even if they are uncomfortable.
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